I used to believe that I needed to “have it all.”
And I see now how this belief got me into some boiling-lava-hot trouble.
What does it even mean, to have it all? I had no idea. I was in pursuit of something with only a vague notion of what that something actually was…
“Wildly Successful Career Outside The Home” + Fabulous Marriage + Home-Sweet-Home + Well-Adjusted Kids + Physical Health + Mental Health + Spiritual Wellbeing + + + + ?
(It’s a big question, hence the big question mark).
Did I miss anything? I’m sure I did. Wait… I know. Chocolate!
To me? “Having it all” means having all the power to choose whatever I want.
And then making sure I get it. That means I invariably make mistakes, which provide me with more data: information I need to gain clarity on what it is I really want.
Sometimes it means I have to go back to the drawing board (with a pouty face) and start again.
On some days I think, “By Jove, I think I’ve got it.”
And on other days I think, “What the….?”
Oprah says it’s possible to have it all, but not all at once. I sometimes wonder how Oprah defines “all.” I think she means having all that matters. And on this, I agree.
What really matters to you? What are you priorities in life? Do some of those priorities squeeze out the others?
In his book, Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less, author Greg McKeown says it’s not about doing more, it’s about doing what is “right” for you. I like that word, “right.” It’s not simply about doing what I “love.” That’s not enough. What I love must also be right for me.
It takes discipline to stay focused on what is right for each of us and not get sidetracked by the things Other People say we ought to be doing.
It requires knowing who you are, accepting who you are, and then moving forward, asking for guidance along the way from those whom you trust will only help you follow your own heart.
After all, what good would it be to have it all if your heart wasn’t in its “right” place.
Big love to you my friend!
Lin E
I recently went back to the drawing board (yes, with a bit of a pout) and came up with something that feels so right and true to me my feet have barely touched the floor. I’ll be sharing it soon. What about you? What does your drawing board look like? Click HERE to continue the conversation on Facebook.
